"Melbin, Act 1" (June 10)

Because I can read your minds, I know that a few of you are thinking, "Didn't you go to Melbourne a few weeks ago? Where are those photos?"

And because in my head you all now have Australian accents, I know that you pronounce Melbourne as "Melbin."

(My great-grandfather's name was Melbin. No wait — it was Melvin. Never mind.)

So, like the good little blogger that I am, I will now share with you my photos from our trip to Melbourne, in two acts. The first act takes place on the day of our arrival.

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S A T U R D A Y,  J U N E  1 0

Having only purchased our flight tickets the day before, we didn't have much time to prepare for our trip to Melbourne. I emailed Josh, a client of mine in Seattle, who had lived in Melbourne for 5 years and asked him for some "must see" recommendations. He gave me a short but concise list and instructed me to photograph all of it.

I don't think he'll be disappointed.

We took a taxi to the airport (much cheaper than the train if you have 2 or more people), and since Australia doesn't seem to care to see any identification for those flying domestically, check-in and security was a breeze.

Of course, it was quite obvious when we got to security who the Americans were; we were the ones stripping down to the bare minimum without even being asked, taking off belts, shoes, jackets, watches, jewelry... when I realized that no one else was doing the same and told Crash, he brushed me off. He already had both boots off, was working on his belt, and he sure wasn't going to stop now. He was on a roll.

Even with the small self-inflicted delay, we still had time to grab a quick drink. (I'd advise skipping the Bloody Mary's at the bar near Sydeny's Virgin Blue check-in; although the bartender used Worschester sauce, his embellishment of the drink stopped there. Even the airlines give you a lime when you order regular bloody mary mix without alcohol; this guy seemed to think that 2 long straws would give it all the flavour it needed.

We did a little browsing of airport trinkets, and then boarded our flight. Virgin Blue loads people on from the front AND back of the plane simultaneously, which makes things nice and quick. We were seated in the back, and so we had to go outside and around the plane — a LARGE plane — and climb up some stairs. By doing this we got to see that our plane was named "Kimberley Cutie."



Did I miss something? Is it 1943? Is this a B-52 bomber we're boarding?

How quaint, I thought, until Crash pointed out as we were walking up the stairs how any passerby could just huck an object into the engine (already running) and blow the whole plane up just by jamming the turbine. And, well, since they hadn't checked our ID at all since arriving at the airport...

I hushed Crash, pulled him by the arm up the stairs, and we ducked into the plane.

About 2 hours or so later we arrived at Melbourne Airport and took a shuttle bus to downtown Melbourne. The ride took about 30 minutes, and was very, very BLUE.



We decided it was so that people wouldn't be tempted to locate every single vein in their body and shoot up drugs right then and there. I of course had to challenge this, and began pointing out my veins to Crash:

"See? There's one there, and there, and there... these lights don't work at all!"

Crash hushed me and turned to look out the window.

He's got his turbines, I've got my blue lights.




A Book by Its Cover

I'm a designer. A book designer, even. And so yes, I judge books by their covers. I even judge some places by their websites. Places and people that are quite nice often have hideous web sites. I forgot, in my haste to find us downtown accomodations that wouldn't break the bank, that not so nice places can have nice-looking websites.

And so, I was a bit shocked that Victoria Hall was not what I expected it to be. Although the people that worked there were quite nice and helpful, we found this out in situations such as this: "Your room is 58 degrees and falling and you're freezing cold and your boyfriend can't figure out how to hack the system? Yeah, we're on central air and so we can't control it. I'll bring you up some extra blankets." And she did. Immediately.

The carpets showed their wear, with cigarette burns, dirt, and a mysterious puddle that grew from one of the men's restrooms during the 3 days we were there. In our room, we had an iron burn in the carpet the size of my foot, and it was as I was photographing it that I realized that the carpet was not salt-and-pepper gray, but gray with black animal hair in it. I quickly put my shoes back on.

Crash shrugged. "It's not that bad," he said, trying to make me feel better.

And no, in the grand scheme of things it wasn't that bad. There weren't shady characters hanging around the building, there weren't frat boys running around yelling at 3am, the staff was quite nice, and the location was excellent. But I will confess that I refrained from using the shower while we were there, as I'd forgotten to bring flip-flops to wear. It's the oldest rule of hostel travel, and in my "old age" I'd forgetten it. I thought maybe I wouldn't have to worry about that rule. Oops.

Once we were unpacked (which really was just a matter of putting our bags in the closet), we grabbed the guidebook and headed outside to explore downtown. We had the better part of an afternoon to explore.

I don't recall the names of many of the buildings or places, so my details might not be all that exact. But here it goes:


Arcades: Not Just for Pac-man Anymore

Nestled between the new and old buildings are little covered alleyways that have become little shopping meccas of the city. There are cafe's hidden among them, giving the whole thing a very European feel. We poked around a bit and then found a cafe to grab some coffee and lunch in.
























Big Buildings That Are Probably Important














Random Street Scenes

















Hardware Lane:










Chinatown:




Impromptu breakdancing scene that broke out in front of a small street busking band playing Led Zeppelin:




Melbourne's got a lot of interesting things in its windows; I did realize till I gathered these photos just how many there were:















Federation Square












Circus Oz

One of the reasons we chose to go to Melbourne this particular weekend was to see Circus Oz. (You're surprised? How else would 2 jugglers spend their Saturday night?)





Any circus that serves Gin & Tonics...





and Fairy Floss (cotton candy)...



...is A-OK by me!




Walking along the River

After the show we walked back along the river, checking out the art in the park as well as the night skyline.






















A bike taxi &mdash co-mingling with car taxis!





Letterpress

On the way back to the hotel we passed an Antiquarian Bookstore that I may not have noticed if it weren't for its big letterpress books on display. Crash patiently waited while I snapped a few photos. I even recognized some of the names of people that did the books; the display was mostly of American work.







Waiting for Something

These statues were on one of Melbourne's downtown street corners. I loved their goofy faces and big round mouths.





. . . . . .

It's intermission time! Get up, stretch, grab some snacks in the lobby, then come back for Act 2.